It's Kind Of a Funny Story

Today something really embarrassing happened, but before I tell you I'd like to say that I have a new article on Domestic Square Peg! It was on the front page at some point, but it relates to my little story. If you have time, it'd be great for you to read it. If not, here's the jist of it: I'm failing school and it puts me in some uncomfortable situations.
One of the biggest ways we learn here in Spanish school is through taking tests. I can say without a doubt that I have gotten a 10% on the last, like, forty tests I've had to take. On the History test I took on Friday about the Cold War, I probably knew how to answer two of the ten questions. I used to consider myself smart, or at least not stupid, but I've definitely started to question myself in the last couple months. So, on this History test, I had about 45 minutes left over after answering those two questions, and I decided to write a list at the bottom of the test of things that I DO know how to do to make myself feel a little bit better. Things like "how to read Hebrew" and "how to properly use a semicolon" and "how to Photoshop Chewbacca into a convertible" made this list.
First of all, may I admit that I didn't think my History teacher knew how to speak any English. He's tried talking to me in English before, and as far as I could tell it was at a pretty elementary level. Turns out he can read English, though, or at least put it into Google Translate and figure out what I was saying. So when he handed back our tests today, instead of handing mine to me and lecturing me on my study habits like he normally does, he told me loudly that NO ONE thought I was dumb and that I didn't need to prove myself to him. One of the kids I sit next to overheard and asked what he was talking about, and my teacher proceeded to read off my list of things that I know how to do to the entire class, translating when necessary. It was a long and painful process. Also, now all the kids in my class know that I pride myself in my knowledge of 70's punk lyrics.
At least they don't think I'm stupid, though.

Depende

As a student ambassador for the country of America, I'm quite often asked questions that require an exceptionally assumptive answer. It gets rather annoying, having to make broad generalizations about one of the biggest countries in the world, especially over and over again. So, I repeatedly give the same answer: "depende." Here are some examples of questions to which I respond with "depends."

• Do Americans eat fast food all the time?
• Do you go far away for university?
• Is it easy to pass classes?
• What're the traditional foods that Americans eat?
• Is there a beach really close by?
• Are there a lot of Muslims/blacks/Asians etc.?
• Are there gangs?

I'm sure I'll be updating this as new ones come along. But the moral of the story is, there are very few things that you can say that would accurately sum up all of America.